Erectile dysfunction facts and myths, busted
Erectile dysfunction (ED) myths spread faster than the facts. A short, confident myth is easier to repeat than a careful fact, and shame about erection trouble means few men stop to check what they have heard. The reality is that anxiety, stress, and lifestyle can all play a role in ED, and so can age. Pills are not the only fix, and ED can affect men of any age. Up to 30% of men under 40 have experienced erection difficulties, and psychological factors are a common and important cause, particularly in younger men (Nguyen et al., 2017). That means many ED myths get the cause wrong before they even get to the fix.
Below, we check four common myths against the evidence.
Myth: Men are always ready for sex, no questions asked
Fact: no. Your psychological state affects your ability to have sex as much as your body does.
Libido can dip for short periods, and that's not a big deal. Longer dips are common too, and they usually come from a specific place:
- Stress or a low mood, which pulls your attention away from your body and onto your worries
- Anxiety, which keeps your mind busy with what might go wrong and is where a lot of erection worries start
- Pressure to perform, which can shut down desire before it starts
- Relationship strain, which can make sex feel like one more thing to manage
- Tiredness, which leaves less energy for arousal
- Low testosterone, which lowers your drive to have sex in the first place
Society makes this harder. We often hear that men always want sex, with anyone, at any moment. That idea is harmful. It tells a man that a tired body or a low mood is a personal failure, and it can push him into sex when his head is not in it.
The opposite myth does similar damage to women. Many women hear that they never want sex and have to be talked into it. Both ideas treat people as stereotypes instead of individuals. Good sex happens between consenting adults who both feel ready, in body and in mind.
If your libido has dipped for a few days, that's normal. If something feels off for weeks rather than days, it's worth talking to a doctor about what to expect from that first appointment.
Myth: Erectile dysfunction only affects older men
Fact: no. ED can affect men of any age, and it's common in younger men too. Up to 30% of men under 40 have experienced erection difficulties, and psychological factors are a common and important cause in this age group (Nguyen et al., 2017).
Rates do rise with age (Nguyen et al., 2017). Physical health problems are linked to ED too.
In a large study of men aged 40 to 70, ED was more likely in men with heart disease, high blood pressure, or diabetes. Smoking raised the risk of complete ED in men who already had heart disease or high blood pressure (Feldman et al., 1994).
Psychological causes, like stress and relationship strain, show up at every age. That is why a younger man can have ED with a healthy body, and an older man can have ED with no physical cause at all.
The table below shows how ED rates change with age. The figures for older men come from that same study of men aged 40 to 70 near Boston, so they may not match every group of men today.
| Group | What the research found | Source |
|---|---|---|
| Men under 40 | Up to 30% have experienced erection difficulties | Nguyen et al., 2017 |
| Men aged 40 to 70 | 52% had some degree of ED, from mild to complete | Feldman et al., 1994 |
| Men aged 40 | About 5% had complete ED | Feldman et al., 1994 |
| Men aged 70 | About 15% had complete ED, three times the rate at 40 | Feldman et al., 1994 |
Causes also look different depending on what is behind the problem. This table shows the two main groups and what each one does to an erection.
| Type of cause | Examples | What happens in the body |
|---|---|---|
| Physical | Diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease, smoking | Blood flow to the penis is restricted, so it is harder to get or keep an erection |
| Psychological | Stress, performance anxiety, relationship strain, low mood | The nervous system learns to treat sex as a threat, which gets in the way of arousal |
If you think you're dealing with ED, working out whether it's physical or psychological is a sensible first step, whatever your age.
Myth: Pills like Viagra are the only way to treat ED
Fact: no. Medication can help for some men, so talk to a doctor about whether it's right for you. It is one option among several.
For many younger men, ED starts in the mind. That psychological erectile dysfunction loop is stress, performance anxiety, and a nervous system that has learned to treat sex as a threat instead of pleasure.
The psychological side responds to a different kind of work: regulating your nervous system, untangling from performance pressure, and training arousal with intention instead of urgency. This is what The Erection Reset, Mojo's evidence-based program led by Dr. Shannon Chavez, is built for. Chavez is a licensed clinical psychologist and sex therapist, and specializes in performance pressure and erectile dysfunction.
Does ED stop women from enjoying sex?
No. Most women's pleasure does not depend only on a partner's erection.
Many men come to Mojo mainly for their partner. In fact, 70% of men using Mojo cite partner pleasure as their primary motivation (Mojo internal data). If a man focuses on his partner's pleasure, sex can be enjoyable for both people, even when his erection is unpredictable.
Sex also doesn’t have to end in penetration. Sensate focus is a set of touch exercises that sex therapists use. Partners take turns touching each other with no goal of intercourse or a lasting erection. The aim is to enjoy the feeling of touch itself.
You can try the same idea at home. Give each other a massage, kiss for longer than usual, or stroke each other's skin and say what feels good. All of this counts as intimacy, and none of it needs a sustained erection.
Other ED myths, answered
Mojo has a growing set of articles that each take on one specific ED myth in depth:
- Stinging nettles and ED
- Coca-Cola and ED
- Toothpaste and ED
- Nuts and ED
- Garlic and ED
- Cycling and ED
- Cocaine and ED
Got one we haven't covered? Send it to the Mojo community. We'll keep busting them.
The Mojo philosophy: sex education doesn't stop after high school
Stress, biology, and circulating myths are common causes of erection trouble. They add up to a pattern, and patterns can change.
The Erection Reset is Mojo's evidence-based program for the psychological side of ED, built with Dr. Shannon Chavez. It works on the nervous system, the pressure, and the story you've built around what happened last time.
FAQs
Up to 30% of men under 40 have experienced erection difficulties. Rates rise with age, but ED can affect men of any age (Nguyen et al., 2017).
It can be either. Psychological factors are a common and important cause of ED, particularly in younger men (Nguyen et al., 2017).
It depends on the cause. Medication can help for some men, and a doctor can tell you whether it's right for you. Many cases in younger men are psychological, so other approaches, like therapy, are often part of the answer too.
No. Most women's pleasure does not depend only on a partner's erection, which is one reason shifting focus during ED can still lead to satisfying sex for both partners.
Sources
- Feldman, H. A., Goldstein, I., Hatzichristou, D. G., Krane, R. J., & McKinlay, J. B. (1994). Impotence and its medical and psychosocial correlates: Results of the Massachusetts Male Aging Study. Journal of Urology, 151(1), 54–61. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8254833/
- Nguyen, H. M. T., et al. (2017). Erectile dysfunction in young men: A review of the prevalence and risk factors. Sexual Medicine Reviews, 5(4), 508–520. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sxmr.2017.05.004
- Shirazi, T., Renfro, K. J., Lloyd, E., & Wallen, K. (2017). Women's experience of orgasm during intercourse: Question semantics affect women's reports and men's estimates of orgasm occurrence. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 47(3), 605–613. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-017-1102-6
Mojo aims to provide useful wellbeing resources to its users; however, you should not solely rely on opinions or advice available on the Website or given by the Community. Always seek advice from a qualified medical doctor or other healthcare professional before acting.
About the experts
With 18 years as an accredited COSRT and BACP therapist, Amanda helps people navigate desire, intimacy, and the changes life brings.
Help is available when you're feeling low – you don't have to suffer in silence. If you're in crisis or struggling to cope, find someone to talk to on Find a Helpline.
